Stuff (some) Christians Like: Trying to Sneak People into Heaven
I’m the only person I know who was heavily persecuted for being a fan of “Weird Al” Yankovic.
If DC Talk teamed up with Voice of the Martyrs to write a book about fans of Weird Al who endured persecution, my story would be in the first few pages. In 7th and 8th Grade, he was my musical world – and why not? Whatever music was popular at the time, Weird Al had a funnier version.
In my desire to be accepted by the other kids, I would defend my reasons behind my favorite musician, only to be thwarted by claims that he “never writes his own music, just steals from other people.” Anyone who has actually owned an album knows that at least half of his songs are originals, but to add to my persecution story, they refused to look at the liner notes to see that for themselves.
Later, I came up with a strategy: play Weird Al’s songs at a low volume around people who like the song he parodied, and then wait for them to say they like it before revealing what they were really listening to.
I later moved into other genres, ultimately Christian music, and found myself doing the same thing: playing ApologetiX or Disciple or Demon Hunter loud enough for other people to hear, then hoping for an opportunity to tell others it’s a Christian band, and hoping that would lead to their salvation. It’s like black ops evangelism.
Bottom line: I was trying to find ways to sneak people into salvation.
In one episode of Community, Annie says to Shirley, “Ever since you found out I was Jewish, you’ve been trying to invite me to a ‘pool party’ that was really a baptism!” Shirley, not to be outdone, replies, “Don’t blame me for trying to sneak you into Heaven.”
And I think we all do that sometimes. We get this idea that if we place people in a Christian environment and then pull off the sheet that was covering our church sign, people will discover they actually like Christianity more than they ever realized, and the whole thing will be like a giant surprise party. This sounds like such a great idea, why don’t we do this more often?
Oh yeah, that’s how the enemy works. First of all, satan tries to sneak us into situations filled with sin and convince us how much we actually like it without ever telling us it’s sin. Secondly, there’s this little matter of this little Light of mine and whether I’m letting it shine, neither hiding it under a bushel basket nor letting satan whoof it out.
Thirdly (I’ve always questioned whether that’s an actual word) and probably most importantly, non-Christians are smarter than we give them credit for, and we aren’t as sneaky as we give ourselves credit for. A friend of mine was talking to a visitor at a church event, who said he felt deceived in coming to an event that he didn’t know was meant to get him saved. Oops, that’s not how that’s supposed to work. But then again, as an adult, I’ve been to a limited number of non-church parties that had no alcohol and involved a professional blessing.
And then again, shouldn’t we be honest about our motives and intents if we really want people to trust us to lead them into salvation?